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  • By now, everyone is aware of the new abortion ban law Alabama passed on May 15, 2019. For years, abortion has began to be challenged by Conservatives and "pro-life" believers. Roe v. Wade was established in January of 1973. For nearly a decade, Conservatives, religious believers and pro-life believers have fought to challenge Roe v. Wade. It has been 46 years since Roe v. Wade was passed — as a woman, I am scared for what this means for women. I am not entirely sure what is in store for women, trans-men, intersex women, all women if we don't stand the f*ck up and speak out. There is 50 states in the United States of America and of those 50 states Ohio, Kentucky, Mississipi, Georgia, Utah and Arkansas have passed Fetal Heartbeat Laws. Alabama officially has the most restrictive, extreme and dangerous abortion law in the entire country; with no exception for rape or incest. Those are only the states that have successfully signed the bills and passed the laws. In total, 30 abortion laws have been passed so far. States actively considering and submitting bills against abortion are: - Florida (Florida already f*cking sucked) is considering 2 bills — one limiting abortions after 20 weeks of pregnancy but the second one is worse, as they are considering a fetal heartbeat bill - Louisiana will soon pass a fetal heartbeat bill - South Carolina is considering a fetal heartbeat bill - Maryland failed to pass a fetal heartbeat bill but will file again - Minnesota is considering a bill banning abortions after 20 weeks - West Virginia introduced a fetal heartbeat bill in the beginning of the year - Missouri's heartbeat bill has successfully gone through the state Senate and is heading to the Republican-controlled House. - Tennessee passed a bill that would ban abortions completely and indefinitely, if Roe v. Wade is overturned There is only three states in the entire f*cking country who are pro-choice and although some may view their abortion laws as extreme (probably someone who is pro-life, anti-abortions or hasn't read the full bills) and those are New york, Virginia — which has expanded the amount of providers that perform abortions and Kansas, which ruled about two months ago that they would protects a woman's right to terminate a pregnancy. Everyone should be upset about the Abortion Bans. Every. Single. Human. Being. Should be f*cking upset. This did not start happening yesterday, it didn't start happening a year or two ago... Republicans began challenging Roe v Wade since 2010. Alabama successfully being the first state to pass such an outrageous and extreme law since Roe v Wade, was all the fuel the rest of the Conservatives in this country and the "pro-life" believers needed to really challenge Roe v Wade. I put "pro-life" in quotation marks because it is clear they are not pro-life. These bills are inhumane and an attack on women's reproductive rights. Boards and panels of strictly men are literally trying to tell women what they can and can't do with their bodies and to think ANYONE is okay with that, enrages me and it should enrage you too. "Abortion was and continues to be a central issue of feminism and to women's rights" Have you ever had an abortion? I have . I've had two abortions, one at 19 and the other at 23. They were the best decisions I have made in MY life. If I had to go back both times and do something differently, I would not have done sh*t differently. My feelings are the same as they were. My abortions have allowed me the opportunity to make something great of myself. I had and have no business having a child that I am not ready for. I was not ready emotionally, physically, financially, mentally. Why would any woman want to bring a child into this world to live a mediocre life, when you want to offer your child a great, nurturing, loving and happy life, filled with opportunities and abundance. Did any of what I just said above affect or change your course of life, in any way? No, it didn't. So why are MEN and a large amount of women — so against abortion? I had absolutely no business bringing a human being into this world when I was not yet done making a life for myself. I am my first priority and my first love and I was not going to bring my second love, my child, into this world under the circumstances I was in. And you can miss me with the "you should have been on birth control" sob story because I was on birth control the first time I got pregnant and that is actually why I choose to not use birth control. What no one f*cking tells you about abortions is how difficult of a decision it is to make. You imagine a life where you can hold your own blood and love and protect them but it is not that simple. The decision, both times came fairly qucikly to me because I knew and understood I was not ready. The first time was so f*cking hard because I didn't want to be judged by my grandparents and I didn't want to have to explain myself or my decision to anyone else. Good thing I quickly came to realize, I don't owe anyone any explanation for my decisions. My uterus , my rules, my decisions. These fetal heartbeat bans are outrageous because most women don't find out they're pregnant until their first missed period (a cycle is 3-4, your first missed period would be two weeks after) and that is assuming one woman shows the same symptoms as the next woman, which is highly ignorant and uneducated to believe because all bodies are different. I didn't find out until I was shy of 9 weeks the first time and less than 7 weeks the second time and both times I had no symptoms, just something in me (no pun intended) just knew I had to take a pregnancy test. Both times I took the abortion pill (aka misfepristone and misoprostol). Everyone pictures their life differently for themselves. My wants, goals and desires from life is not comparable to anyone else's and no one else's wants, goals and desires is comparable to mine and that is the issue here. We all make decisions for different reasons. Yours may be medical, mine is personal. How I picture my life for the next few years, does not include a child. I love children and I am lucky enough to be surrounded by amazing mothers who let me love their children like they are my own and that is enough for me, for now and that is okay. If you don't like abortions, don't f*cking have one. Use inner and/or outer condoms, get a vasectomy, get on birth control, but do not shove your beliefs down anyone's throat and especially down an entire nations throat. Abortion is fine. Abortion is normal. Abortion saves lives. Some proactive things you can do to fight for abortion rights: - DO NOT FUCK PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT PRO-CHOICE - Normalize abortion by advocating and speakinf the f*ck out about being pro-choice. Don't let anyone dim your voice - VOTE FOR PRO-CHOICE CANDIDATES, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING THAT IS GREAT - Volunteer or donate to your local rape center, if you're from Florida Roxcy Bolton Rape Treatment Center (RTC) is an amazing rape treatment center and they are extremely caring — also a non-profit - Donate to and support Planned Parenthood - Donate to and support NARAL Pro-America who fights daily and for every state - Donate to and support the National Abortion Federation - Volunteer at your local clinic - Accept, understand, and learn that abortion is a basic human right and basic health care necessity - Follow pages that normalize abortions like @shoutyourabortion It is a terrifying time to be a woman, but it does not have to be. Speak up and speak out. Whether you have had an abortion, considered one, never had one but support it, are a mother, anyone and everyone should be speaking out about this. #SexTalkWithSteph
  • After popping out a very beautiful baby girl (Hi Zoë!), it has FINALLY dawned on me how much I didn’t know about before I got pregnant. Now, I was always one of those women that watched other people go through it on YouTube and that really made me feel like I had the upper hand. I knew the symptoms, I know what to expect, I knew about labor and delivery! I was ready to go, right? Boy was I wrong! Let’s get right into what I wasn’t prepared for, shall we? 1. No symptoms are the same : I had zero nausea all through my pregnancy and still had my period (or light bleeding) for the first few months! Yes, it happens and it happened to me. I always thought that when I was blessed with a baby, I’d go through it all but this just re-iterates how different all pregnancies are right? 2. I went blind . You read right. My otherwise bearable vision depreciated so badly that I actually had to wear my glasses all the time! WTF right? Who knew that pregnancy could mess with your eyes too? Have you not suffered enough? 3. I developed a gum disease . Back at it again with your immune system betraying you in favor of your little nugget lol. Before pregnancy, my mouth and I had a clean bill of health! During? No comment but the dentist knew my name! 4. My lips, oh my lips! Now, I’ve heard of the swelling, trust me I expected my nose and my feet to deal with me mercilessly but guess what swelled up instead? My lips! Now, this would be amazing if I didn’t already have full lips but I do so…no thanks! 5. The boobies leaked . ALL THROUGH! They leaked almost every day attached to every random baby thought or emotion and it was weird. Some days, I would wake up in a little puddle on my bed. Ew...? 6. My labor was weirdly short . Now, it could have been shorter (it was 5 hours from start to finish) but for a first time mom, the average is from 12-40 hours so there’s that! I went to the hospital in a full face of make up because of how much time I thought I had time! I had my exercise ball to help with labor and a diffuser for ambience. Did I get to whip them out? No! I was in and out of there so fast, my nurses didn’t even get to hear me scream! Pregnancy came chuck full of MANY surprises and even though no two pregnancies even for the same person are the same, I would do it all over again (maybe three more times?) and no, it’s not just something cliché that women say. My advice? Throw away the expectations and experience it all for yourself. Manifest positivity (No crystals I promise lol) and make it your own kind of beautiful. Between the morning sickness, I mean! Don't forget that you are sugar, you are spice and you are BOMB jollof rice!
  • People have been intrigued by breasts for thousands of years. As young women, it’s one of the first things we notice about our changing bodies. They sustain life through breast feeding and can elicit sexual pleasure. Some people love their breasts, others would like to change them. Maintaining healthy breasts is important for every woman. Whether she wants to become a mother or not. Whether she wants to change them or not. The first steps to maintain healthy breasts is your over all health. Maintaining a healthy weight, limiting alcohol, not smoking and exercise all play a vital role in your physical (and mental) health along with keeping those ta-ta’s healthy. Next would be the self-breast exam. Around age 18 women should start to examine their breasts monthly at home. The self-exam starts by laying down, one arm over your head, with the other hand (pads of your fingers) feeling in small circles around ALL the breast tissue. Yes, there is breast tissue in your armpit, so start there. In each area do three circles, light, medium and deep, feeling for any lumps or unexpected bumps. Continue this process from the armpit down towards your bra line, up and down until you reach the nipple. Once finished with the outer part of your breast, you’ll examine the inside (sternum to nipple) area. Your arm will come down to perpendicular (think T shaped) with your body and elbow bent. Repeat the same circle process as before. Whew. Part one done. Now you’ll need to do a visual exam. Look in a mirror with arms at your sides and check for changes in shape, skin, nipples and vein patterns. Now look for those same things with your arms above your head, slightly bent forward, then with hands on hips and hunched over. If you notice any changes, lumps or bumps from month to month contact your doctor. 80% of lumps are not cancerous but it still good to have it checked out by a professional. Also worth noting, some women have fibrocystic breast tissue, meaning they naturally have lumpy breasts, and this is not a concern, just the way you were made. The third step to maintaining your breast health is an annual physical check by your primary care physician (or PCP). For many women this is done during an annual physical and Pap smear, but if you do not have these regularly you will still want to have your breasts examined by your PCP. At this visit they will conduct a similar exam to the self-exam, only more through (and with an expert’s hands). Between age 45-50 women should start to receive mammograms yearly in addition to the PCP exam. Women with a family history of breast cancer (especially those that have been tested and have the BRCA gene) are recommended to start mammograms 10 years before the person was diagnosed with breast cancer. Every woman’s body is unique and beautiful. It’s so important to take care of all of it, particularly your bodacious bosom. Do what you can to stay healthy, examine your knockers, and give yourself some self-love through a self-exam. For More information visit these sites: Mammogram Information Additional information on BRCA 1 & 2 Genes

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